Frozen Food and Fornication
by Richie Cunningham
Summary: Colonel Steve Trevor has alot on his plate being forced to chaperone the 'Wonder Woman'. Diana's costing the U.S. government millions of dollars: what can Colonel Trevor do to pacify her? New 52. Contains strong sexual themes and content.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Wonder Woman, Steve Trevor, or anything associated with either of them. The following contains explicit material that may offend. You have been warned.**

**For those of you who care about this stuff the following takes place just after Justice League 3 (New 52), assuming it was a harpy, and Diana and Steve returned to the Pentagon after her slaying the foul beast. Enjoy.  
**

Frozen Food and Fornication

"Things just keep going from bad to worse," Colonel Steve Trevor sighed as he marched into the assigned quarters for the Themysciran embassy.

It was a hasty set-up, he could tell, but provided all the functional prosperity he would have expected from the U.S. government. He was in a large meeting room complete with carpeted floors, upholstered furniture, and an expensive mahogany table on which rested a tray of silverware and porcelain, including a gently steaming teapot, presumably waiting to be served.

The walls were covered with paraphernalia and Americana, famous scenes of history immortalised by brush and canvas, and other items that he doubted held any significance to the embassy's occupant. It was the kind of place dignitaries would have greeted various representatives from a range of organisations or countries, which was apt, but also the reason why he could tell the lack of preparation or research put into its conception. It was as if someone had seen a picture of what this place should look like, and copied it exactly. Thinking about it, this probably wasn't far from the truth considering the other reason he knew this was a quick job; the location.

The Pentagon was not built to house dangerous super humans from a race of ancient Greek warrior women. Diana of Themyscira was here so she could be easily monitored, but had to have a living space befitting a woman of her position, of course. She was to be on a short leash, and he was the unlucky S.O.B. tethered to the other end.

"What troubles you Steve?" came the voice of the Wonder Woman from her adjacent private room. From where he was standing Steve could just about see the corner of an enormous and lavish four poster bed, one of a pair of extravagant blue armchairs, and the doorway that led to an en suite bathroom, but could not see the lady herself.

"Do you know who I've just been on the phone with?" he began, "The Secretary of State!"

"That is a good thing, is it not? Recognition from your superiors that you no doubt deserve." Diana said as she joined him in the waiting room. At least she had finally given in and put on the civilian clothes that had been provided for her, instead of her more 'traditional' attire. Though he couldn't say he completely disapproved of her Themysciran warrior garments, the way her halterneck shirt displayed her midriff and currently clung to her pert and very ample bosom grabbed his attention instantly, and threatened not to let go. He dragged his eyes away, and forced his mind back on subject.

"Unfortunately not Diana. Let's just say she was less than pleased with your behaviour since arriving in Washington."

"Then why are you upset? Let her voice her grievances with me. Is she a coward?" the Amazon sounded untroubled by the situation.

"She's not a coward, she's just following protocol," he explained, "I'm your liaison here, so I'm the one responsible. Also I'm the one who works for the United States, so I'm the one they can chew up when you act out."

Diana sat down and began to pour herself a cup of fresh tea from the silver teapot on the table. She gestured at the clearly frustrated man, offering him a cup. He shook his head exasperatedly.

"The woman has no cause for concern, I have behaved ever the Themysciran diplomat."

"You've caused over one hundred million dollars worth of property damage!" bellowed the Colonel as he approached the Amazon. He leant heavily on the dark table, resting his weight on both hands across from the seated foreigner. "I have dossiers piled high in my office filled with names of people you or your direct actions have injured! For Christ's sake Diana, you stabbed a man last week!"

"Not a man, a rapist" she replied coldly, taking a short sip of her drink.

"You pinned him to the sidewalk through the leg with you sword!"

She looked up from her cup and stared into her liaison's sky blue eyes. "That was so he couldn't escape. He deserved it, and much worse."

Steve sighed again; he'd been doing that a lot lately he noticed.

"Perhaps he did, but you have to remember we do things differently here, this is not Themyscira, and it's the job of the police, not diplomats, to catch criminals." She leant back in her chair, possibly conceding to him this time. Steve pulled out a chair for himself and joined her seated at the table.

"I don't like this any more than you do," he said as he began to pour himself a cup of tea, and plopped two cubes of sugar into it, "but until further notice you are on complete lockdown. You don't leave this facility unless I accompany you, and you go nowhere within it without my express permission. Clear?"

"What?" Diana burst to her feet and scowled indignantly at him, raising her voice for the first time since the Colonel had entered the embassy. "Who are you who thinks he can tell the Princess of Themyscira where to go and when?"

"Calm down, it's a temporary measure," Steve said, trying to placate the angering Amazon. She may have been beautiful, but she really had a temper on her sometimes, and the last thing he needed right now was an enraged superwoman bursting through the walls of the Pentagon. Again. "I need to be seen as doing something or I'll be having another even less pleasant call from Ms. Rice. Please Diana, just until this blows over? You've hardly spent any time at all here, and there's plenty to do at the Pentagon, trust me."

She glared at him for so long that Steve thought it was another one of her powers. Did she have laser eyes like the Superman? Was he about to burst into flames or something? After several seconds her expression softened and she begrudgingly sat back down.

"Well... So be it. It would be irresponsible for you be punished because of my actions. But only as long as it is temporary."

Relieved, the Colonel smiled at her, "It will be, I promise."

* * *

Three hours later Steve Trevor had grown bored of poker.

They had moved some time ago into the bedroom next door to the waiting room, and were now both on the large, firm mattress with a pile of discarded playing cards between them. Diana, sat crossed legged at the foot of the bed, gathered up the cards and began to shuffle them enthusiastically, whilst Steve was lying at the head, wracking his brain for something to do. He may have been stretching the truth when he said there was plenty to do at the Pentagon. Sure, there was access to practically any information on the planet, but that information wasn't just handed out to everyone who worked here, and especially not to uncontrollable super people who were costing your government millions.

He rolled over onto his side and watched as Diana gathered up her recently dealt hand and smile widely. She had picked up the rules of the game astonishingly quickly, but had the worse poker face the Colonel had ever seen. She looked positively ecstatic every time she received decent cards, and whenever he had caught her with a bluff she'd growled something at him and dealt again. He would have been thousands of dollars up, had they been playing for money. When she realised he was watching her she quickly covered her smile with a pantomime frown.

"I think I've had enough poker for one day," he groaned and returned to lying on his back.

"You know what would raise your spirits?" chirped the Princess, "There is this delicious wine back on Themyscira, made from wild berries and sugar. It is like the sapphic nectar of Aphrodite herself! I did bring some with me when I left to come here, but it was taken when I arrived and never returned to me. It has such an effect on the senses, surely Steve you would have loved it!"

She liked to drink? He didn't know why he was surprised, why wouldn't Amazons have alcohol? From Diana's descriptions Themyscira never struck him as a nation with any sort of prohibition, quite the opposite in fact. Maybe some other time he'd take her up on that drink, but he had a duty to perform, and it was the soldier in him that spoke. "Alcohol can be considered contraband by international law, you can't just go from country to country with bottles of wine under your arms. Besides, how were we to know what it was? Strange liquid in an unmarked bottle from a foreign, and previously unheard of, country, we had to play it safe."

"You could have just asked me," Diana replied indignantly.

Steve sat up and raised an eyebrow, "And you always tell the truth?"

"Yes."

"Oh," Steve said shortly as his eyebrow lowered along with his gaze.

Maybe he'd approached this all wrong. After all, poker was his suggestion, she'd never even heard of it before now. Although Diana had tackled it with the determination and optimism she seemed to handle every challenge with, it clearly wasn't her thing. What would she enjoy doing? Besides fighting and causing damage? The files he had containing official details about her; her height, weight, powers, were no help here. What did he specifically know about her? The sort of things that weren't in the files, that weren't figures and statistics.

"I may not have Themysciran wine, but I think I can get a hold of something almost as good," he said as he stood and made his way to the other room.

"Where are you going?"

"Just wait here, I'll be back in ten minutes," Steve replied as he donned his jacket atop his broad shoulders.

Diana followed him to the door, but stopped on the precipice and folded her arms, "But I thought that I was to accompany you everywhere unless you commanded otherwise."

The Colonel paused before slowly turning and staring into her sky blue eyes, "In that case, by the authority of the United States government I order you to remain in this room until I return."

The Wonder Woman returned his gaze, "As you wish, Colonel Trevor."

* * *

"You said ten minutes, it has been over thirty," complained a frustrated Princess Diana. Steve Trevor did not doubt she was right, but knew she would forgive his tardiness when she saw what he'd brought her.

"I know, I'm sorry, but look what I found at the 7-Eleven." The Colonel grinned as he held up a large tub of strawberry ice cream and a pair of spoons.

"Zeus's beard!" exclaimed Diana, "Ice cream! That stall vendor had more!"

"He sure did," said Steve as he set down the just about frozen container on the bedside table, "and look what else I found on my travels." He reached inside his jacket and produced a slighter smaller than usual green tinted bottle, corked and filled to the neck with some kind of liquid.

"My wine!" beamed the Amazon as she hastily snatched the bottle from his grasp, "But where did you get it?"

"The guys down at the confiscated goods lock-up practically leave that thing wide open for someone with the security codes and clearance level to just walk in and take whatever they want," he replied through quite smug expression.

"You are a good man Steve Trevor," smiled the Princess as she easily uncorked the bottle with a satisfying pop.

"Do we have glasses for that?" said the Colonel as he turned to leave the bedroom to search.

"Glasses?" scoffed Diana, "Perhaps if we had an audience with my mother, but amongst friends such formalities are unnecessary." With that she took a large swig of the unknown wine, some of which Steve noticed ran down her chin and dripped perfectly between her breasts. After swallowing, she slowly licked her lips and trailed her finger between her bosoms and up her chin, gathering the spilt libation before sucking the remnants off her moistened digit.

"'Tis excellent," she said as she offered the bottle to him. He reasoned he was officially off duty five minutes before he went to the lock-up. Well, as off duty as he got in this job. What harm would there be in sharing one drink? He was, after all, still with Diana, what better way to keep an eye on her than sitting in the same room as her?

"Thank you," said Steve as he accepted the wine, and not to be outdone, took a gulp straight from the bottle.

Immediately there was no taste, just the sensation of liquid in his mouth. He waited a moment, but after still nothing decided Diana must have been pulling his chain. Was this what passed as alcohol on Themyscira? As he went to swallow, a pleasant warmth began to fill his mouth, followed by a delicious sweetness that nearly reached the boundaries of overpowering, but never quite got there. As it ran down his throat the warmth became a painless burning that he felt into his stomach, and the flavour began to fade into almost bitterness and lingered there as an aftertaste.

"You like it, I can see it on your face." Diana took the wine from him and placed it on the floor next to the bed and then sat gently at the foot. "And that is not the only thing you like," she purred as she gestured for him to sit next to her and began to slowly stroke between her breasts with her finger.

"Diana, what are you..."

"You like this, do you not? I am not blind Steve, I saw you watching." The trail of her finger was becoming longer and lower, stopping beneath her belly button and snaking back up to her throat. Steve watched on as she detoured on the way back down and began to circle around her already hardening nipple.

"I didn't mean to..." Steve could barely get the words out. The warmth from the wine had continued to spread, and right now it felt like his entire being was swimming in some tropical ocean and wouldn't respond to his will. His head felt as if it wasn't attached to the rest of his body, and his cock threatened to tear right through his pants. Was it the wine? The woman? Or both?

"You need not be ashamed of your desires, they are a gift from the Gods and should be celebrated." Diana lifted away her shirt and tossed it across the room, allowing her unrestrained tits to spill out and her raven black hair to tumble seductively about her bare shoulders. She cupped a breast in each hand as Steve watched, unable to look away as, eyes shut, she expertly squeezed and kneaded them, only stopping to pinch and tug her bullet hard nipples.

"Would you like to see more?" she asked through heavy breathing and bitten lip. All the Colonel of the U.S. Air Force could do was gradually nod his head through an immobile, lust filled haze.

The Princess unbuttoned her pants and pulled them past her bare feet to the floor. She sat back on the king-size mattress and spread her naked thighs, revealing her scant lilac panties. Eyeing Steve temptingly, she wetted a finger in her mouth, letting it linger there just longer than was necessary. She slid it down over her chin, past her clavicle, atop her heaving mammary, caressing the teat as she did so. She continued south, beyond her hard, tight stomach and beneath the cotton barrier separating her womanhood from the world.

Steve looked on, stuck being the voyeur in Diana's sexual theatre. At first he could see she teased herself by only stroking softly the tip of her femininity, short gasps of joy springing from her open mouth. But it was not long before she became more aggressive and began to rub herself frenetically up and down, around and around, and her breath became rumbling wails of ecstasy. When she could stand it no more she brought her knees up, and plunged her quivering finger into her soaking cunt. Diana let out a long and satisfied moan, leaving her digit wedged in her cum drenched valley, and Steve imagined it contracting and gripping his fit to burst prick.

Somewhat out of breath, Diana withdrew and beckoned Steve to her with her pussy slicked finger. He wanted her right now more than anything, but still his body felt weak and unresponsive. Whatever was in that wine, it was more than sugar and berries. As he tried to move the whole room swayed and he overbalanced, the sex hungry Princess of Themyscira catching him by the arm and hoisting him upright. Towering over him, she cradled his head in her hands and gazed wantonly into his unfocussed eyes before kissing him deeply and passionately. Steve did his best to return it, wrapping his arms around the Amazon, his tongue darting around hers where their lips met. He didn't even notice that she had unbuttoned his shirt until it fell from his arms.

Diana lent in close to the Colonel, her lips brushing his ear, and she whispered softly but with certain conviction, "Steve Trevor, I am going to fuck you." That said, the Amazon threw him to the bed as if he weighed nothing at all. For a short moment he felt as if he were flying, as if he had powers of his own, until the world righted itself once again and he found himself lying upon the large and comfortable mattress he had provided the Themysciran in the first place.

There was no pause to the Amazon's lust, no sooner had Steve recovered himself she continued to undress him. He was quickly naked, his fit and toned body exposed to Diana's yearning scrutiny. He was not ashamed, he felt too light, too good to feel ashamed. Besides, Steve Trevor was not shy of his own nudity, especially not when a beautiful woman was joining him, and it appeared that Diana liked what she saw.

"I must admit I do not understand your society's methods of seduction. Card games seem trivial and unrelated to love making. It does appear that Themyscira's are much more effective," smiled Diana as she stared hungrily at Steve's engorged cock. She lent over him and ran her hand over his firm chest and taut abs. "You have the body of a warrior," she referred to a scar running down his left hand side. He was going to explain it was a surgery scar, and nothing to do with his military service, but before he could she cut him off, "I like it."

Steve waited in awe as she moved down and took hold of his granite shaft and slowly started to stroke it. "So hard. As if forged by Hephaestus," commented the Amazon, a little in awe herself. Steve looked down at the Princess as she took his cock into her wet, warm mouth, moving her head up and down to match the strokes of her hand. She glanced up at him coquettishly, quickening her pace, causing the Colonel to grunt in bliss. He rested his hand on her head, an empty gesture, for the Diana needed no guidance. Steve watched her tits sway beneath her with each bob of her head, unable to stifle the sounds triggered by the Amazon's skilled cock-work.

Just as Steve was nearing his limit, Diana abruptly stopped and stood up. "Where are you going?" he asked. She wasn't really going to leave him like this was she?

"I have an idea," she replied. She grabbed the ice cream and one of the spoons from the bedside table and returned. "I wonder what my two favourite things in world would be like if I mixed them together..."

She scooped up a spoonful of ice cream and put it in her mouth, then hastily once again gorged on Steve's swollen member. The sudden chill made him yelp, but Diana ignored this and continued sucking his rod as before, only this time her hands remained firmly on the duvet, letting her mouth and the ice cream do the work. Though at first it was slightly uncomfortable and too cold to be arousing, the sensation of the melting Strawberry Swirl and the gradually rising temperature soon served only to enhance Diana's five-star fellatio. When the feeling subsided, the Amazon repeated the process, leaving the Colonel writhing in a never ending cycle of euphoria. She sucked harder and plunged his twitching, turgid tackle as far back as it would go, gagging herself on his sweet tasting schlong.

"D-Diana, I'm gonna..." Steve panted as his body shuddered all over from the attentions of his horny heroine.

"Yes Steve!" Diana yelled as she pulled his spunk-imminent manhood from her mouth, jerking him off as she did so, "Cover me with your seed!"

Steve Trevor let out a guttural cry as he unleashed a torrent of semen over the Amazon's unblemished tits. She kept stroking his contracting trouser snake, making sure to squeeze out every last drop and happily bathing in his man-milk.

"You are quite the man Steve Trevor," exclaimed the Amazon, taken aback by the sheer volume of spunk the Colonel had produced. She gathered some onto her fingers and sampled it, licking her lips as she did so. "Quite the man indeed."

"And you are... wow," gasped the cum spent Colonel, collapsed in post sex euphoria. He saw the Themysciran Princess get up and make her way to the ensuite bathroom, naked except for a wet pair of panties, covered in his cum, but still dignified nonetheless. He heard the sound of running water, no doubt Diana washing up. How much jizz was that? He didn't remember ever squirting that much, even as a young man. Was it the wine? Did she drug him? No, Diana wouldn't do that, not on purpose anyway. But something was definitely wrong with whatever that drink was, even Diana transformed once she'd had some, though she at least had remained in control of her faculties. Mostly. Maybe it had a stronger effect on him because Themyscirans were made of sterner stuff. Which means she did...

"Don't get too comfortable," Diana said as she emerged from the bathroom. She was holding something in her hand that Steve couldn't quite see, even as he unsteadily sat up.

"Diana, what's in that wine?"

"I told you, berries and sugar. It is the most fantastic concoction is it not?"

"It certainly had an effect on me," Steve said sheepishly as he sat on the edge of the bed, gathering his bearings. "What's that you've got there?"

"This?" Diana said as she revealed what she holding. It took Steve several seconds through his hazed vision to realise what it was, but once he did, he was more than a little worried.

"Is that a... strap on?"

"Strap on? Is that what you call them here?" the Princess seemed to consider this for a moment, "Yes, I suppose that it is what it is. We call them fuck phalluses. Each one is made specifically for the person whom commissioned it, so it distinctively fits the contours of her body. You get to choose the size and shape, and then it is crafted from a minotaur's horn by the greatest artisans Themyscira has to offer."

Steve was surprised by the question that spilled from his lips next. "How did you get it here? We searched your bags and seized anything remotely suspicious." He immediately thought that this was not the most pressing matter to attend to at this current juncture. Seriously, what was in that wine?

"Do you really want to know?" Diana said as she looked down, eyebrows raised, and smiled.

"Forget it," he replied as the Amazon stepped into the leather harness and pulled it up to fit snugly around her thighs and buttocks. "Wait, y-you're not really going to..."

"I said, did I not, that I was going to fuck you. Now I intend to make that statement a fact." Before Steve could object, the warrior woman had thrown him onto his belly and pulled his ass up in the air. As he tried to squirm free he heard the Princess spit, and was soon aware of her ice cream and spunk laden saliva sliding down the cleft between his firm cheeks and gathering around his puckered anus. Soon after he felt the hard and surprisingly warm dildo searching for his unprepared sphincter. He tried to wriggle away, to postpone what he knew was the inevitable, but even without his unresponsive limbs, her strength was uncanny and it was a futile effort.

"D-Diana, wait, I don't want to..." The movement at his back door stopped. Had his protest been heeded? Was she really not going to do it? After all this?"

The Wonder Woman leaned over him, her large breasts pressing against his bare back, and whispered in his ear once again. "Before I do fuck you Steve Trevor, I want you to ask me to do it. Ask this Princess to pleasure your posterior!"

The tone of her voice made the Colonel tremble, and a revelation dawned on him. He did want it; he did want to feel Diana inside him, or as damn close as he could get to it. He didn't care whether it was the Themysciran alcohol, or if she had cast some sort of spell on him, he just wanted Diana to fuck him. He wanted to feel that hard shaft slide into his forbidden hole, and to wallow in the sensation of being violated in such a way.

"Do it," he sighed, "fuck me Diana."

Permission granted, and her prey defeated, the Amazon slithered her eight inch keratin cock into the awaiting Colonel. There was little resistance; Steve had given up trying to fight it, his body craved her now. She was gentle at first, slowly sliding in and out of him, allowing his asshole to accommodate the new intruder. The initial pain faded away quickly and Steve focused on this new experience of being penetrated; it wasn't as directly stimulating as Diana's earlier efforts, but every time she gave him her full length he shuddered and his cock gave an instinctive twitch. Diana must have noticed this, as her fucking became deeper and more deliberate, causing Steve to moan wantonly and his member to quiver incessantly. The Amazon's own breathing soon started to become laboured, as if she were feeding from Steve's gratification.

The slapping of flesh on flesh filled the Themysciran embassy, accompanied by guttural groaning of the occupants. Steve found that his body was now acting of its own accord, leaning back onto the Princess's makeshift penis, impaling himself upon it to match her thrusting.

Unable to hold back any longer, Diana began to hasten the speed of her sphincter stabbing. She plunged her fuck phallus harder and harder in towards her partner's bowels. Every nerve ending in Steve's body seemed to come alive to the increased rhythm of her thrusting, slowly building towards the epic crescendo that was promised him. Diana moaned in tandem with the Colonel, feeling his body start to tighten, his groaning becoming longer and more unrestrained. They both knew Steve was close approaching his limit.

"Cum for me Steve! Shoot your seed with my phallus inside you!" bellowed Diana, sounding as if she were in almost as much ecstasy as the Colonel. Steve's only reply was a lewd growl, building in intensity as Diana concentrated on his imminent orgasm.

"Oh shit!" cried Steve as he bolted upright against the Amazon, pumping out torrents of spunk all over the headboard and pillows, his anus contracting around Diana's cock simultaneously as each spout of cum. Again and again he squirted, his balls draining of every last drop he had.

After several moments of stillness and quiet, both of them riding the wave of euphoria, Diana withdrew her expertly crafted schlong from within Steve Trevor. He collapsed atop the sex damp sheets, his ragged breath the only sound now. Meanwhile, Diana stepped out of her harness, allowing it to unceremoniously drop to the floor.

"It appears as if there was plenty to do here at the Pentagon after all," uttered a completely sex spent Colonel Trevor as he turned onto his back to look at the seemly unfazed Diana of Themyscira.

Diana picked up the tub of ice cream and a spoon, and sat herself down in one of the royal blue armchairs, still naked except for her damp stained underwear. She scooped up a spoonful of Strawberry Swirl and smiled mischievously at the Colonel. "I've hardly started with you Steve Trevor."

**As always, thanks for reading at least this part, and double thanks if you read the whole thing. Whatever you thought please leave a review to let me know. Stroke my ego and I'm more likely to do more of these.  
**


End file.
